Last week I got the wind knocked out of me, which hasn’t happened in years. And I thought, “Wow, I forgot how much this sucks!”
But then, you know what’s worse than getting the wind knocked out of you?
No? Well, I’m gonna tell you.
Getting the wind knocked out of you, but people are watching. It’s way worse.
Because they see you fall or trip or do whatever foolish and ungraceful thing caused this strange phenomenon in the first place, and then you’re lying on the ground (or floor, in my case) and thinking about how much it sucks, and then someone (sometimes many someones) starts being all concerned because you aren’t moving. And they inevitably ask the polite and reasonable question: “Are you okay?”
And internally, you think, “Am I okay? No! I’m not okay! I no longer have any air in my lungs! Something is broken! And I’m embarrassed! But also, if you give me 30-60 seconds I’ll be able to breathe again, and another minute or week and I won’t have any injuries left from this experience except on my ego so in the grand scheme of things, yes, I’ll be okay.” But you can’t say any of this, because you have no air in your lungs. So you’re left with the only option: throw your thumb in the air in a “yeah, I’m good” gesture, but make sure you give it the intensity and facial expression of flipping someone the bird, so they know there are so many more emotions behind it than just, “yeah, I’m good.”
Okay that last part might be just me.
But it’s true. You’re okay but you’re not okay, but you can’t really communicate it, and you’re stuck just lying there, while people watch and the situation steadily increases in embarrassment level. Until finally your lungs relax, you start taking shallow and then slowly deeper breaths, then eventually you get up, assess your wounds, tell your friends you really are okay, and brush off your dignity and live to fight another day. (Unless, of course, you’ve broken something, and then you should seek medical attention. But that’s a different post.)
And ever since this incident, I’ve been thinking: this happens to me a lot more frequently emotionally than it does physically. An emotional hit takes the air out of my lungs, and the next thing I know I’m lying on the floor, okay but not okay. The hit could be a text from a friend that someone we knew passed away. Or a bad fight with a coworker. Or just a really sucky day that just continues to get worse. Whatever it is, it takes the air out, and I’m lying there, waiting, and the people around me want to know if I’m okay.
No. Yes. I need a minute.
And I don’t know if there’s anything I can do to change that reality – the emotional hits are just part of life. But I am curious if there’s anything else I can do when it does happen. So what do you do when you get the wind knocked out of you emotionally?
Leave a Reply