Two Kinds of Weird Phrases

So this week I decided that there are two kinds of weird phrases.

Hear me out:

The first kind of weird phrases we say the unexpected and absurd phrases. The kind where we have barely finished speaking before we think, “Wow, that’s a sentence I never thought I’d say.” Or, alternatively, someone else comments, “Wow, that’s a sentence I never thought I’d hear,” usually with some judgment.

This happens to me most frequently when I’m dealing with children or coaching at the gym. For instance, I recently heard myself say the following sentence:

“If you keep hitting me with your toothbrush, you don’t get to brush your teeth.”

A) Not a sentence I ever thought I’d say.

B) Not even a super helpful sentence once it was out of my mouth.

Another example:

“But where is the bottom of the beard?”

A) Didn’t see that coming.

B) What? Even I’m not sure what I was trying to say.

(I have to admit to making up a little song to sing afterward about “the bottom of the beard” – sort of an Irish drinking song if you will. So that one turned out okay.)

Weird phrases that you didn’t really mean to come out the way they did.

But then there’s the second kind of weird phrase.

This kind is identical to the first, with one exception:

It’s something you want to say more often.

For example, I recently said this to my roommate:

“I just showered myself in parmesan cheese.”

A) Not a sentence I ever thought I’d say.

B) Unclear and, again, not super helpful.

C) Marvelous and delightful.

Why don’t we say that more often? Heck, why don’t we do that more often?! I want to shower in parmesan cheese at least monthly! Don’t you??

In conclusion, I’m going to try to include these phrases in my life a bit more. As you may recall from my recent post about nonsense, I think we all need a little more whimsy in our lives, and integrating the second kind of Weird Phrase might just be a good way to do that. And really, even the first kind of weird phrase would increase whimsy and delight, don’t you think?

So tell me, do you agree with my assessment? And what weird phrases have you said lately?